Serial Dater

By: Jay Dee, MPH

You know what I want this season?

Bomb sex.

Amazing dates.

Intelligent conversations.

All from an attractive, generous, honest man!

Years ago, I made a decision: I no longer want to be someone’s girlfriend. In fact, during my time with that terrible man, I promised myself that if it didn’t work out, I would never again play the role of "girlfriend." But I broke my own rule. I gave in. I became a girlfriend again. Eye roll.

This time around? I’m standing firm.

I truly enjoy dating. I love the thrill of meeting new people, the variety of experiences, and the autonomy it gives me over my love life. Serial dating—intentionally connecting with multiple people—feels adventurous, powerful, even liberating. My energy is magnetic when I’m in this space.

Why would I give years of my life to one person, hoping and waiting for a ring, when I can explore what I truly want and who I truly align with—without blind loyalty to a maybe?

I know someone’s thinking, “But what about cheating? What if he can’t commit?”

Cheaters get married every day, B.

Marriage isn’t proof of character. You want to know if someone’s worth your time? Observe how they live. Are they honest? Do they follow through on their word? How do they handle stress, success, and setbacks? What are their friendships like? Their family dynamics? These answers aren’t revealed by locking yourself into exclusivity. They’re revealed over time, through experience and intentional dating.

Dating multiple people doesn’t mean you’re careless. It means you’re careful. You’re discerning. You’re gathering data and choosing, not settling.

Serial dating offers perspective. When you meet different types of men, you start recognizing patterns, red flags, green lights. You compare how you feel, how you're treated, what excites you, and what doesn't. That’s clarity you don’t get when you hyper-focus on one person too soon.

Exclusive dating early on can create tunnel vision. You invest deeply before you even know if this person is aligned with your long-term goals. Then you look up five years later wondering what happened to your time—and your standards.

Serial dating is not the absence of commitment. It’s the presence of intention. It's the willingness to learn, evolve, and not force forever with someone who doesn’t deserve it.

Dating is not monogamy by default. Dating has structure, agreements, boundaries.Dating is a discovery tool.Dating can lead to engagement and marriage—but it doesn’t have to.Dating is not one-size-fits-all. Dating is whatever you define it to be.

So, what kind of dater are you?

Serial (multiple) or exclusive (one person)?And most importantly—why?

Because “I want to” is always reason enough.

Document your dating journey in Table For One.

Until Next Time,

The Vagina Liberator