Faking It for the Fantasy: My Unsexy But Orgasmic Masturbation Secret

By: Jay Dee, MPH

Chillleee… so you know how I told you to use masturbation as a tool to initiate sex? Well, I never said you couldn't fake it!

Listen—there are plenty of positions that are comfortable, effective, and even a little sexy. But MY go-to position? Baby, it’s 100% unappealing. Like, I would never masturbate in that position in front of a partner. Ever. And that’s okay!

Recently, I went live on IG with Nikkita Grady, and we got real about masturbation. Positions came up, and I described mine. It may not look good, but trust me—it gets the job done every single time. Click here to watch the replay (and prepare to laugh and learn).

Here’s a Fun Fact:

I almost never use toys when I masturbate solo, and the position never changes. Once I close my eyes, it’s like I’m with whomever, doing whatever. In that moment, I’m fully immersed in my fantasy. Five minutes later? BOOM. Orgasm. And then? The best nap of my life. I wake up refreshed, recharged, and feeling like a new woman.

So honestly? If it works, it works. Stick to your tried-and-true—unless you’re pretending to look sexy for your partner. (LOL, we’ve all been there.)

5 Tips for a Fire Solo Session:

1. Get comfortable – Find a position that works for you (even if it’s not IG Live-worthy).

2. Get lost in your fantasies – Your imagination is your most powerful sex toy.

3. Use lube – Always. You're not a desert, and friction isn’t cute.

4. Keep going until you're moaning – Don’t stop at “meh.” Go all the way.

5. Practice aftercare – Wipe up, hydrate, and bask in your post-orgasm glow.

   
   

Masturbation isn’t about performance. It’s about pleasure. Whether you’re arching your back like a vixen or curled up like a roly-poly, do what feels good.

Own your orgasm, sis.

Until Next Time,

The Vagina Liberator